A to Z ... And a tiny update

Age - 33
Bed size - Queen
Chore that you hate - Emptying the cat box (which is why it's Dave's job!)
Dogs - Three: Lilly (3 YO yorkie poo/jack russell mix), Carmen (8 month black lab), and Gracie (10 YO bichon)
Essential start to your day - Coffee, coffee, COFFEE!!!!
Favorite color - Red baby!
Gold or silver - Silver now, but I used to wear only gold jewelry
Height - 5' 7.5"
Instruments you play - None now, but I did learn the sax in 5th grade
Job title - Assistant Professor
Kids - Miles (15/bonus son) and Ella (5)
Live - Ohio
Mother’s name - Marlene (and I don't post her middle name because she would Kill me, with a capital K)
Nicknames - Marc, Lightning
Overnight hospital stays - Pg with Ella and stayed at OSU to get my blood sugar under control and then of course when she came into the world
Pet peeves -I have quite a few...People who say, "I seen...", unmade beds, toothpaste in the sink, slow drivers...
Quote from a movie - Yikes. I had a few in my head just a second ago, but for the life of me, I can't think of them now...
Right or left handed - Right
Siblings - 1 older sister and 1 younger brother
Television - Sponge Bob and HGTV
Underwear - Non-essential
Vegetable you hate - It would be shorter to list what I do eat!
What makes you run late - Having a set time to be somewhere lol
X-Rays - Dental, finger, and knees
Yummy food that you make - Tater tot casserole is about it!
Zoo animal - Zebra

Ok, so I realize I have been away for quite some time. I'm working to change that. Many ideas in my head on how to do that, and I can't nail them down quite yet. What direction should I take this? What is my goal? Once I get those questions answered, I think it will be much easier to frequently update and communicate.

Happy New Year!

I use an academic year calendar instead of the "normal" calendar that 99% of the world uses. My routine for making the big switch each year goes something like this:

1. Gather my old and new calendars.
2. Fix myself a cold drink (normally ice water since I have to have a clear head).
3. Gather my beautiful colored pens.
4. Get comfortable either on the deck or in a chair inside.

I love the smell of the new, untouched pages.

I love the way the colored pens are sitting ready...waiting for me to decide the categories for using them. (this would have been a great time to snap a photo, but I failed to see the future)

I love the fresh lines and the peace that comes from looking at the new calendar with nothing written in it. (again...awesome photo op!)

Today, August 15, was the day I chose to start planning out my life for the new year. I gathered up my pens, calendars, laptop, and ice water, and got comfortable.

First, I had to look up Miles's football schedule. Black ink for games and practices.

Next, I wrote down Eben's work schedule (blue ink, bottom left corner of the boxes to mark each day scheduled and what shift).

Next, I tried to work on Dave's work schedule (black ink to keep Dave and Miles in the same color family ... color family is important because they are family, ya know?). Since Dave's schedule is still something I can't quite put my head around, I must wait for him to assist me.

Next, I took my red Sharpie pen (oh how I love Sharpie pens!) and recorded important dates for work and life itself...what week of the quarter it is (recorded numerically at the top of the Monday slot and circled), special birthdays (lots of them coming up in the family!), and then other commitments we already have (golf outings, nail appointments, meetings, etc.).

Next, I went online and looked at the schedule for Ella's dance. Here, this is where it happened. I realized that there just aren't enough hours in the day for me to be here and there and present for two activities on the same days at the same times for both kids. I feel like a gingerbread man about to be broken in two.

Ella can't do dance until Miles is done with football because we will either miss dance classes or miss football games because it is geographically impossible for me to be in Zanesville at 5 for dance and in Claymont (or elsewhere traipsing around the green earth because Miles plays in a league I have never even heard of...and that league includes some crazy schools I have never heard of, let alone know where they might be) at 5 for a football game.

This beast schedule of ours makes me appreciate my parents even more. I have no earthly idea how they had three kids, close in age, involved in dance, cheerleading, sports, etc., and held down full-time jobs.

It's a blessing, though, that our lives are busy. Aren't idle hands the devil's workshop?

All of these marks of ink in my calendar remind me how lucky I am...and to sleep now while I can before the crazy school year starts back up. Speaking of the school year, I have four more weeks without a set "work schedule." I am planning to enjoy the hell out of every minute I have left!

Wisdom to the Younger Me

I read a long time ago about some people who had written letters to the younger version of themselves. Basically, the premise is that you would write a letter to the 13-year-old you (or whatever age you choose) but write it with the wisdom of your years and without giving away many details. I have been wondering what I would say to myself, what advice I would give, and what warnings I would include. So here is my letter to my 13-year-old self. Enjoy!

Dear Marcie:


Your hair will grow! I know you hate the short hair and regret cutting it off, but have no fear...it will grow back. Hair always does. And trust me, you are going to do lots of experiments with it - have fun! Your hair does not define you.


Stop goofing off in math! (Had to throw that in for good measure...)


Enjoy your teenage years; your 20s will bring more than enough responsibility.


Treasure the relationship you have with your siblings instead of fighting with them over trivial matters. At the end of the day, and at the end of life, all you have is your family. You will need to band together and face tough choices, but you will make the right ones if you do it together. One thing you have learned already (and something you will continue to rely on) is your strong bond to your family.


You are going to be hurt by people you love. There is no way around it. But you need to continue to believe that you are making the right decisions in life, even if they do not agree with you.


Success is coming your way, baby! First, you will need to get through college so save your money. Books are expensive! You need to learn to stand up for yourself, too, so pay close attention in human relations courses.


You will be totally overwhelmed by your inability to reach a dream. Do not, no matter what, beat yourself up over it. It's not going to be your fault and as soon as someone listens to you, you will find out why. You will then be overwhelmed by the blessings that rough time will bring...I promise!


Don't fret about getting older. You will age to perfection, and be happier than ever. With age comes wisdom and understanding. You will be living the life you designed for yourself, even if you feel somewhat unsure about your path. Embrace YOU!

Much love,
The 32-year-old version of you

Slacker!

I'm a total slacker...I'm so sorry!

Ella and I are sitting here chillaxin and waiting for a storm to roll through. She is still in her nightgown! Lazy summer days I tell ya.

I needed to go to work today to pick up papers to be graded, but I didn't make it. The day isn't over yet, I know, but it almost seems crazy to get her dressed now, right? {I'm now patiently waiting for my Mother of the Year Award to be delivered...ahem.}

Since I did not officially announce it on here, I thought I should tell you that one of my goals for 2011 was to finally get the ink on the paper. I did. On June 20, in a 10-minute conversation in a stuffy room with stuffy attorneys, Eben and I officially ended our marriage. We are still very good friends who share mutual respect and love, and of course, our daughter. While no longer IN love, we will always love the other (at least that is the plan) because of our entwined past and our entwined future of raising our daughter together, yet apart.

I have also successfully read books this year. In fact, I read a really light, easy book called the Penny Pinchers Club, and it was awesome. It was a birthday present from a friend and I read it in one afternoon.

I haven't really created anything yet (another goal of mine for the year) except for a bunch of tears and your normal carbon footprint kind of thing. I bought a stepping stone kit for the kids last summer that we didn't get around to doing. I am thinking I will bust that out on Friday when we have a more relaxed day. It will be fun to let them get all messy.

As for my other goals, the only one I remember is getting in the kitchen more. I have to admit, I go to the kitchen to make a fresh drink and that's about it. Take out is so much more convenient (and frozen pizza).

We just got a downpour and it didn't even last long enough to make the deck wet. We have gotten into our summer rituals of sitting on the deck, spending time with friends and family, crashing pools (ha ha), playing cornhole, and chillaxing...easy living!

I have at least three different blog posts writing themselves in my head right now, so I hope to not be gone as long as I was this time.

Oh, and I'm currently loving http://pinterest.com/. Check it out if you have a few minutes...err...I mean hours...to spare...err...I mean waste. But it won't be a waste! I promise. TONS of ideas and inspiration!

Sick Baby

So much for keeping this thing updated for the new year. Tonight, I will write to renew my commitment to myself to keep going and hopefully spark something within. I normally write for therapy (it's free), and I'm certain people will say that I haven't written because I haven't needed therapy. While that statement is not at all true, I have chosen to give myself therapy in other ways (like reading and just being in this world), but tonight I am compelled to write.

In some ways, my problems are too deep and personal for me to discuss in such a public forum...having others see the real me and then open myself to judgement scares me a little bit.

My little peanut is sick and has been sick for two days. I have stated before that divorce shouldn't be hard (and I still maintain that fact), but it isn't until something is actually real that you can experience certain moments in it. I'm experiencing Ella being sick and being with her dad. It's hard when all I want to do is cuddle her and keep her safe and spoil her with popsicles and soup and shhh...candy. And maybe even a new Barbie. Or some other toy she will play with for a few days and then drop into the toy box and forget until she unearths it three months from now. But that would be okay because she is sick.

It was hard hearing that her stand-in mommy made her soup yesterday and cuddled on the couch watching movies. It was hard hearing her say that her stand-in mommy took care of her. I realize that she is more than a stand-in mommy, and in fact, I am pleased with the choice Eben has made. It was just so hard because she was an hour away. It's not like I could drive across town to cuddle with her.

Haters would say, "It's not that far, Marcie. You should have been there for your child." But what would that have been saying to the other party? "I don't trust your judgement." "I don't think you can handle this."??? Would that have been fair? Would that have undermined him in some way to our daughter, the girl we chose to raise together even if we are apart?

I did, fortunately, get to cuddle with her at the doctor today. We adults worked together to decide to take her to the doctor, and we worked together on how to schedule the appointment to maximize the time Ella would be in town. I moved a mountain out of my way at work today so I could leave, attend the appointment, and get back to work in time for a meeting. I guess that is better than not knowing that she even had an appointment, right?

I have said it before, communication is key. The adults communicated about what is best for the little person involved. The adults showed their united front --- yet again --- to everyone including the doctor, the other adults involved, and most importantly, to the little person who makes the sun rise and set in our lives.

The emotions were pushed aside to do what was best for our child. The emotions were put away in their little brown paper sack (BPS) and brought back out only after the immediate issue was dealt with. Tonight, I dealt with those emotions. I cried because I was not sitting on MY couch cuddling with MY peanut. Then I thanked God because she was cuddling with her dad on his couch in the other place she is safe and sound and well cared for.

My BPS is a mixed bag, and slowly, as time goes on, I am able to deal with each emotion within. Progress.

Item #1 on shopping list: Toy for Ella.

Monday's Update

I did it! I did it! I need a backpack and a zippy little Dora song!

Ella and I put dinner in the crockpot this morning. I did not touch the raw meat; I used a fork for that. WOOT!

The Christmas tree is now naked in the living room. Taking the ornaments off took a long time (well, I was distracted by the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills), so I stopped before taking off the lights and actually dismantling the tree. :)

My BFF got some rocking news today and her excitement poured out of her texts. This BFF is super proud of that BFF. Like, totally proud!

The winter blues are knocking on the door, and in an effort to fight them off, tomorrow night's dinner will remind us of what we had for the 4th of July - grill and all.

Unfortunately, yesterday, I was reminded of how immature adults can be. Tsk, tsk. Big girl panties were put on, lips were zipped, and the drama was kicked to the curb. Avoidance is not normally my style, but it was the best for the situation. And you know what? I saw the line in the sand and knew I couldn't erase it, step over it, or ignore it. How is that for growth and maturity?

Another item on the resolution list was to get crafty again. The past few days I have spent some time looking at crafts, doing some research, and trying to figure out where this all will take me. Needless to say, excitement is pouring out of me right now, too. Making messes in the name of being creative is exciting!

My word for 2011 is Create. Create my future, create my memories, create experiences, create crafts, and create a place of love of warmth for family and friends. Totally doable! Check back here for more progress reports and maybe even to catch a glimpse of things I have been creating!

What I'm Doing

currently, procrastinating on working on my to-do list. :)

I have been looking through recipe books this morning looking for meal ideas for the coming week. I get to hang out with the kids on Monday since we have a holiday from school/work. I am going to get out the crock pot and make something! WOOT. We might also do a little meal prep for the coming week since the kids will essentially be with us all week.

One of my resolutions is to find and perfect 12 new (to me) recipes this year. I am going to choose a pork crock pot recipe as my first one. There doesn't appear to be any touching of raw meat involved with this recipe, so I am pretty comfortable. lol

My to-do list today includes grading papers, preparing for classes on Tuesday, working on a big project for work, making the grocery list and going to the grocery, unloading/reloading dishwasher, dusting, running the sweeper, and the one I am ashamed of...{taking down the Christmas tree and decorations}.

Yes, the tree is still up. I love it so much that it depresses me just thinking of taking it down. The dog must be ready for it to come down, though, because she gave us a pretty big hint. She took it upon herself to eat quite a few of the lights off the bottom. lol

The dust is screaming my name...