The real update (with photos)

Groceries are now safely tucked away in the cabinets and refrigerator. No spoiling food here. Okay...so all of my irrational fears from yesterday were for nothing. I should have been more afraid of the traffic and the parking situation than of the actual grocery experience. Short version:

• Arrived at Kroger at 10 til 12 after four meltdowns prior to leaving (Ella's, not mine. Okay - one for me and three for her. No? Fine. Two each. We were even Steven.)


• Spent 5 minutes looking for single onions instead of a bag


• Found single onions


• Picked up the rest from the list with very little driving in circles


• Could not find the candy/gum aisle


• Drove in a circle


• Located the gum


• Got my very own Plus card in my name


• Checked out and was in the car by 12:30

While I was in Chicago in October, four people stopped me to ask for directions. Taumi and I decided that I look like such a native in that awesome city that people assumed I was. Amazingly, I was asked for directions to the produce section by some person who apparently thought the fresh foods were with the beer and wine. Even I know better than that.

Ella was pretty good for our trip. I am going to try to figure out a way to plan far enough ahead to avoid taking her with me in the future. For no other reason than to avoid bitch slapping the people who call her a boy. Come on...she has a braided purple hat with a purple coat with pink shoes. How could she possibly pass for a boy?

Here is a picture of us at the end of our shopping trip. My hair in the picture does not look much different than it normally does except for the color. I am loving the color. Totally loving it. It's very warm. I like warm. Especially when it is very cold outside. I don't like warm as much when it is warm outside. See how hard it is to please me?

I wonder if a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser would take those damn wrinkles off of my eyes?